I recently came under attack by a coven of Jehovah's Witnesses hovering outside my house. For those of you who have had the same misfortune, it can be somewhat traumatic. As I opened the gates to leave for my own secular salvation (a.k.a Virgin Active Canala Walk), these relentless vultures honed in for the kill. "Are your parents home?" hissed the high priestess. "No, and I am in a hurry," I replied shortly. "Well, let me leave you with one thought then," she continued as she opened up her black book. Before she had the chance to recite another utterance, the words exploded out my mouth like a canon "I do not believe in God!"
The impact of my tone sent this bothersome brood straight back to the Chrysler Voyagers from which they emerged, and even though I tried to shake it off, this evangelistic encounter troubled me for days. I was infuriated by their so-called superiority and sales-like approach to something as private as religion, but more so because I was forced to question the truth behind the words that had flown out of my mouth so callously. Had I finally joined the flock of faithless followers or was I simply intolerant of hypocritical religious dogma? Religion is something you're born into and like so many, I was indoctrinated to believe what others wanted me to believe. Anyone that questioned it would burn eternally in the fires of hell and curiosity would guarantee a trip to a dark room with a strange man and a handful of summoned Marys...quite ironic I think. But what happens when you ask and you don't receive? What happens when you've made the effort to help yourself and God doesn't even have the courtesy to RSVP? Should we hold onto our faith or continue to waste our precious time on something so intangible. And then it hit me: was love the new religion and if so when did I lose so much faith?
Concepts like love and religion are one and the same; ideas forced upon us by people who think they know better and who usually want something, and just
like religion they comprise of rules and guidelines that are supposed to help us make
sense of the world. But what happens when it all stops making sense? What happens when these expectations are not met with the same amount of commitment and devotion? Had I stumbled upon a new religion of the faithless? Tired of countless disappointments, I abandoned the notion of white knights and tall horses a long time ago, and even though I was in a committed relationship, I followed my head and not my heart. Some people call it cynical but my somewhat sceptical outlook has helped me deal with the many inconsistencies that love has brought into my life, and just like that Jehovah's Witness, I wanted to preach the good word to anyone that would listen.
Bradley was the perfect example: he was one of those genuinely nice guys whose life would be so much easier if he were just gay. He was hopelessly hung up on a girl he met six months ago who now wanted nothing to do with him. To complicate matters, he was having trouble deciphering the mixed messages she kept sending him. Just like that Jehovah, I wanted to convert and save him from the eternal torture of heartbreak by helping him see the light but despite my words of wisdom and advice to move on and up, he was adamant to make things work with Barbara. As I listened to him ramble on, I couldn't help but pity and admire him at the same time. Why was he so hellbent on making it work? Was he infatuated or was he really in love? Why did he continue to worship something that didn't even acknowledge his bleeding heart? Was this the thing they call faith?
I call it stupidity. The truth is we all want to believe in something because the idea of nothing is far too unbearable to accept. We forget that sometimes love works out but sometimes you have to find companionship in loneliness. Trust me there are far worse fates in life. As for religion, she is not a cock so please don't force your ideology down someone else's throat even if they do give you the time of day. Always keep an open mind even if you don't agree with what is being said.
When it comes to love, why should we convert?